Ferdinand Magellan Circumnavigates Disneyland and Las Vegas: World Possession Made Easy

Ferdinand Magellan Circumnavigates Disneyland and Las Vegas: World Possession Made Easy

Anno Domini 1522: Portuguese explorer Ferdinand Magellan’s Victoria returns to harbour in Spain after circumnavigating the globe, tying up the world with a golden girdle—which is a necklace, which is a collar, which is a garotte. Magellan himself had so famously expired many months ago on the island of Mactan in the Philippines—speared to death like a fish, by all accounts—but, alas, the flat-earth, anti-Cartographic forces of the universe were too late. Magellan’s will be done: the globe is complete.

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